This is funny and we’re fans of funny–especially going into the end of the week. Much love to Alex Rainert who made these. And sorry to our friends at Microsoft, Google, and Oracle ahead of time

Org Chart of Famous Co's

and very cool at the same time. Parker is someone that we’ve known and followed since the dawn of Napster and know his story well. In case you don’t know who he is and your reading this: he’s a reformed (possibly) hacker from his early days, founded Napster, likes to party, reinvented himself as kick-ass VC, helped Facebook in early days to get funding, is behind some great new offerings and owns a pretty stellar pad in Manhattan. That’s a quick sum–anyway, check out this very funny, awkward and engaging chat between Jimmy Fallon and Mr. Parker at the recent NExTWork Conference. One other thing: Justin Timberlake played him in The Social Network–which he’s still clearly uncomfortable with. Check it out, check it outers:

Check out this infograph–what happens on the web in 60 seconds:

60 Seconds on the We

Glaring omission: no mention of Android app downloads…

Let us state first and foremost: we’re about real relationships and fostering those relationships, so in no way do we support the service we’re about to discuss. We’re curious on your thoughts about it though.

Is this your fake girlfriend? Possibly

Op-Ed: We’re going to talk about something that’s extremely taboo–dating and social networking. Or maybe better described as: “stalking” and social networking. If you’ve seen The Social Network movie or have read Accidental Billionaires you know the real reason Facebook was invented– a couple of nerdy guys needed it to have an easier time to get dates with women (and to get back at women who dumped them). Since 2003, we’ve seen social networks evolve more and more but one thing has remained the same: (smart or stalker) guys use the services to find out what a girl they like is interested in and try to use this angle to their advantage. But they still need to talk to the girl. Until now…

Lane Meyer-- a stalker?

Enter in the reverse of the activity above: Cloud Girlfriend. The concept according to the founder David Fuhriman is it can help guys get a girlfriend. In other words, prey on peoples general nature that someone is more attractive when they’re taken. It all seems bizarre to us and even more so it feels a little creepy. Here’s some other details according to Business Insider:

• Cloud Girlfriend will consist of a network of real human beings, not automated bots, that users will interact with over Facebook.
• Fuhriman thinks it can help guys get a girlfriend.  If visitors to your Facebook profile to see wall posts from your imaginary sweetheart, they might think, “Someone else thinks highly enough of this person to date him, so maybe I should too.”
• Fuhriman said the site has a therapeutic value and can fulfill psychological needs like intimacy and friendship even though the interaction is virtual. He also maintains that these interactions can even build self confidence and help users navigate real-life situations.

That’s right–we’re talking a fake girlfriend. You tell them what you like and they output a fake girlfriend onto your Facebook page. The reason: so you can try and trick girls into liking you more because you’re taken. Bizarre? Yes. Genius? Remains to be seen.

These guys got the girls so they didn't need Cloud Girlfriend but it might have helped them a bit

One improvement this service could do is up productivity within the work place. I tell this story often but when MySpace was all the rage, I worked at an office where every guy was trying to date the girls from the print team. We were in a meeting when one of the media supervisors on our team starts talking about his love of scented candles and all of a sudden one of the print girls says: “I LOVE scented candles!!!” And within minutes they were talking and he was trying to make plans with her. Safe to say stalking her MySpace page helped him break the ice but at the end of the day–you still have to be yourself and your fatal flaws will be shown–cloud girlfriend or real girlfriend or no girlfriend. And in the end, that relationship fizzled before it began but it was funny to see in action.

What do you think of Cloud Girlfriend? Is it going to take off? Or fizzle badly?

The Agency Issue (next week the Client Issue)

They keep saying we have to integrate! What about just promoting print?!

Think back to the year 2006. The word that year in advertising was Integration. It was everywhere, especially in Los Angeles where nothing was integrated but the word was used in nearly every conversation. I remember working on a large automobile client at the time at one of the largest media agencies in the world  and it was nearly comical the amount of times this word was used. Unfortunately, the word was being used by people who had no intention of putting it into action for any client. They wanted to stick with their tried and true method and not incorporate anything digital into the plans. But integration is the middle of the argument. We must first start as to why we should recommend integrated campaigns to clients. And again–as you may have noticed from reading this blog and reading our agency mission statement–it’s all about results. So let’s start there…

1. Not all clients and campaigns need integration. The reason: the results generated might not be best served if we integrate just to integrate. Ex. putting more money into search and social is better than spreading it around to all mediums. The amount of client $$$ will go further say in search and social (just as example) to generate better results than say spreading the money into OOH, Print, Social, and Search. The mediums get spread to thin and thus lose their effectiveness.

2. Integration must serve the main purpose: results for the client. If we’re starting with the two main objectives of awareness and sales then we can start to see what certain mediums can do for the client. For instance, TV, Print and Radio can help with mass awareness while digital components such as mobile, social, and specific online initiatives could lead to sales all the while complimenting the TV, Print, and Radio. But these results must be determined well before planning stages kick in. In particular, the most important view from a planner’s perspective considering a recommendation of integrated mediums is to make sure all of these mediums “Talk to each other”.

Still a great example of integration: Apple's Mac vs. PC on NYTimes.com

ex. OOH ads should have a mobile component which in turn helps point to the clients Facebook page which in turn helps generate leads, sprouts a contest with hints from Twitter, or points to the eCommerce page for a discount. By doing this, we enter the consumer cycle…

3. The consumer cycle. From an agency perspective, we must always look at a brands consumer and their cycle from becoming aware of the product to purchasing the product. It’s a mystery but with the dawn of all this great technology around us, we must help clients shorten this gap.

Check out all this media!

But this leads to a more important fact: it’s our duty to convince clients the importance of integration for the best optimal results for their brand. We must first have the brands best interest in mind. We must have the clients best interest in mind. We must NOT have our best interest in mind. My agency friends reading this know all to well the people we’ve worked with who only care about themselves. This damages everything. The brands results must come first, last, and everything in-between. We must start with the consumer cycle. Ex. What type of consumer is the brand after? What type of consumer does the brand attract? A tech saavy consumer? A non-tech saavy consumer? Is it someone who uses a smartphone to check reviews? To check-in? To be a “cool-hunter”? Who is this consumer?

Once the agency digs deep enough the possibility to use different mediums to make a holistic integrated campaign for maximum results is endless. As an agency, you must know the mediums, research, and most importantly the way to utilize these mediums to generate the best results possible for your client.

Motion Capture this man!

Over the past 8 years, Bill Simmons has been a media powerhouse. He’s arguably been the most important writer and media entity for ESPN and drives a substantial amount of traffic to ESPN.com. For all of us on the digital side of media, he’s always been one of us. He’s a writer with an appreciation for the written word and worshiped different traditional mediums growing up only to see those traditional mediums shut their door in his face due to ego, pride, more ego, and an ability to refuse to adapt to the culture and changing times. Did we also mention their egos? Mr. Simmons succeeded anyway and tomorrow it all comes full circle with the launch of his new website Grantland.com. He’s getting what he’s always wanted: his own magazine/his own newspaper dedicated to sports and popular culture. ESPN.com even has a countdown ticker on their homepage today for its launch. And he’s put together quite an impressive list of employees–click here

Bill Simmons flexing? The painters cap is excellent

The question for ad agencies: do you know who Bill Simmons is? Are you suggesting Grantland.com for your clients? Time to start looking at this man and his new media empire. Mr. Simmons we salute you.

Let's buy this Chairy!

In the past 3 months, many big box stores have been stating they’re starting to incorporate iPads into their stores. Does this mean we’re going to have to explain to kids what a cash register was? Well..yes. But it means more than new technology replacing cash registers within retail stores. The importance of tablets coming to your local big box stores  is one solution to filling a gap that’s existed: internet shopping vs. retail shopping. In other words, retail stores have suffered since the dawn of the internet because it’s pulled people away from driving to the store, finding parking and then browsing for a few hours and hoping to find a new pair of shoes. With the adoption of tablet technology, this will help bridge the digital divide for consumers who still shop in stores.

How?

The tablets will be able to showcase products, utilize Augmented Reality to show how the clothes look on you, offer special discounts to specific brands, show different variations of the product, show availability in the store/other stores, check you in for points via Shopkick or Foursquare, and be able to pay for purchases right off the tablet. In fact, Square — the company started by Twitter’s Jack Dorsey–has struck a deal to become the main point of sale via tablets (and iPhones) within Apple stores. Here’s a better look of it in action in Japan:

iPad2 is coming to Apple Store’s for retail use

What does this mean for stores?

They’re going to have to figure out if they want employees walking around with the tablets or if they’re stationary like cash registers. If they’re mobile with the employees, then stores will have to figure out new point of sale strategies in order to get customers to buy more than just what they’re after. A possible strategy is for employees to load up the tablets with deals which the consumer will have to sift through before checking out. Specific stores like JC Penny have already started using iPads in store to sell jewelry. They’re testing this new technology before they roll it out store wide. This is an evolving area within the retail business–stay tuned and let us know what you think.

I remember my first cell phone clearly. I was a little late to the game– it was 1998 and most people I knew had a mobile phone already. At that point in time I didn’t realize I was officially participating in network externality–creating value to the mobile phone units for myself and others just by owning one. The value of the phone at this time was incredible–all of us could talk on the go, anywhere and the phones were smaller than the Zack Morris phones of old. But the value everyone brought to this market eventually helped bring about better devices, hence the network effect. The early adopters brought value which in turn had others buying in and so on and so on.

Social networks work the same way–the more people partake in it the more useful the service it is. And this is why Google is trying so hard to get into social. Everyone knows they have the users and the money but not in the social space. With their most recent release, +1 — is this the final answer? It’s been described as a similar version of Facebook “likes” but within the algorithm of search. In other words, a social recommendation within search. This looks to be a solid first step but will it work? Will people start to use it to develop that network effect?

What are your thoughts?

Expanding on our writing about The Network Effect, we remembered a great talk Sean Parker (of Napster, Plaxo, Facebook, and Causes.com fame–among others)  gave about this very topic. It spurred Pascal-Emmanuel Gobry to tweet while in the audience: “If you’re in the internet business and you don’t watch this Sean Parker video, you might as well quit right now.” He makes some interesting (if not obvious) points:

Web 2.0 Summit-Sean Parker talk

In a recent post on AdAge, the self-proclaimed “Media Guy” Simon Dumenco writes a scathing article that everyone needs to calm down and get their facts straight that Twitter didn’t break the Osama Bin Laden death. In particular, he’s highly upset with Matt Rosoff of Business Insider for writing an article titled “Twitter just had it’s CNN moment”. To Rosoff’s credit, he wrote a rebuttal to Dumenco trying to figure out why he’s so angry and ask if a rumor turns out to be true, is it news. Rosoff asks:

Why is Simon Dumenco so angry about my calling attention to this?

I have no idea, but I have a theory, and it comes down to a different point of view about “news.”

Rosoff is partially right in his answer–Dumenco does have a different view about news. But for Dumenco it goes beyond who’s delivering the news (mainly not him and his fellow journo’s but people like you and me). Let’s just state the obvious: Dumenco hates Social Media. The reason? Social Media has taken down his holier than though journalistic cred and has handed it over to all of us. That’s not good for Dumenco so his way of dealing with this is to complain, whine, and write nasty things all in the name of journalism so he can “convince” and “teach us” that Twitter, Facebook, Blogs, and all things digital are bad. It’s a great position to position oneself because he can always state “I never said I don’t like digital media!” but nearly every article is some back-handed slap toward digital media. Instead of adjusting to the times and realizing that being a journalist isn’t being a Navy SEAL but actually anyone can do it–he refuses to believe and in so doing says things like “But a lot of the hyperventilating about Twitter “breaking” the bin Laden story is just bullshit.” Rosoff is right–he is an angry guy that should just be called the “Traditional Media Guy” at Ad Age not “Media Guy”.

A media person is someone who encompasses ALL media not traditional media first and foremost and then “I’m on Twitter and Facebook, so I’m cool with digital media”. Clients shouldn’t have to read this type of article in AdAge. It does nothing but continue to show the divide within the global agency world between traditionalist thinking and full-service acceptance. The question shouldn’t be “Who leads: traditional or digital?” but how best to generate results for the client. Good on ya Matt Rosoff for calling Dumenco out and bringing this issue to the forefront.